Episode 108 - Seeing What’s Not There

When I’m outside and have nothing to do, I like to look to the sky and watch the clouds. As I do, I see all manner of things, Sausage dogs, Dragons and Dinosaurs riding motorbikes all included. Of course I don’t really see these things, I see the clouds which I am able to imagine resembling these things. The human mind is incredible in its creative ability to imagine all sorts of things and to see very plane ordinary things and to imagine them to be something unbelievable and out of this world. It’s not just clouds, its soapy dishwater, patterned carpets and even pancakes. No matter what the canvas though, I am always fully aware that these are mere likenesses not reality.

Yesterday however, as I watched Casper the friendly ghost being chased by a confused narwhal holding a hair drier, I realised something. Sometimes, when I see people, or when I see events unfolding in life, I use my ever so creative mind to fill in the blanks, to create the information I don’t have to help me better understand what is going on. Now there is nothing wrong with this in itself, when done well it helps me engage more fully with what is going around me and makes me better equipped to help with the possible things that may be going on. But then, unlike the clouds or the soapy dishwater, I forget that this information is a creation of my own mind, a probable deviant from reality. And so my perception of what is before me becomes warped. Instead of reserving judgement and remaining open minded, I too quickly judge by appearances and jump to conclusions. I’m sure that’s it not just me, at least I hope it’s not, but either way, whilst it’s okay to form first impressions, I’ll try to remember that they are just Dinosaurs riding motorbikes.

Episode 107 - What's the Point of Going Around and Around in Circles?

Yesterday I did something that I often do on a Sunday afternoon, I watched the Formula 1 Grand Prix. My Mum faithfully sat beside me and watched it with me as she often has done ever since I first started watching it as a young child. When she first started watching it with me she found it hard to understand what I found so entertaining about it. In fact I think she found 22 cars going around and around in circles not only boring, but pointless. What after all was the point? After two hours of racing they all (hopefully) end up exactly where they started and that only after having gone over exactly the same ground somewhere between 44 and 77 times. Of course it seemed pointless to my mum because she had missed the point. The objective was not what she might have wanted to achieve from a Sunday afternoon drive. It was not about where they got to, but how quickly. And every lap the drivers completed may not have got them any further from where they began but which each completed lap they got a step closer to their final objective. Not only that, but with each repeated loop the drivers became better acquainted to circuit they were navigating and were able to go around it faster still.

Okay, I know that to some of you reading this, the whole endeavour of a Formula 1 race will still seem boring and a waste of everyone’s time, but whether or not that is true stands beside my point. Whether or not you enjoy watching motorsport, sometimes life feels like it is just going around and around in circles, doing a lot of travelling but never getting anywhere. Much like a Formula 1 car. When my life feels like this I like to remember my Mum and the Formula 1 because often it’s not that I’m not getting anywhere in life, it’s just that I’m missing the point. Often I think I’m trying to get to some place far away from where I am, when really God wants me to stay exactly where, and to really get to understand the lessons I keep repeating. Other times my misunderstanding of God’s plans and purpose don’t fit nearly so well into this analogy, but the point still remains; I feel like I’m not making any progress because I’m looking at the wrong objective. So when I feel like I’m going around in circles, I like to ask God; “what’s the point?”

Episode 106 - The Great Escape

This week I’ve been having a great time visiting a friend in Cornwall. My friend has a house cat called Hugo. Being a house cat Hugo always stays within the house. This includes the back garden which has a tall custom made fence with spikes on top to prevent any attempts of a break out. Remarkably this works; Hugo can’t get out, neighbouring cats can’t get in and Hugo is safe. Hugo doesn’t seem to particularly like this however. Admittedly it’s difficult to be sure of what exactly Hugo does and does like as he is quite possibly the grumpiest looking cat I have ever set eyes on. Still, the way that he paces along the garden fence, circles the perimeter and sticks his face into every little gap he can find seems to suggest that he has a break for freedom in mind. In fact every morning I half expected to see him riding a motorcycle at full speed towards the fence a little like Steve McQueen in the great escape. Sadly this never happened.

One day however, Hugo did escape. An open window was left unguarded and after a while of not having seen him, once we saw the window we knew he must have taken his opportunity whilst it was there. At first a great wave of worry hit us as we thought about how far away he might already be and about what trouble he could get himself into. This concern was only short lived though, as when we left the front door to look for him we immediately saw him lying on the grass in front of the house. 

The ridiculousness of the situation was apparent to all; having finally got the freedom he has searched for for so long and now having the freedom to go anywhere he wanted to, he chose to stay exactly where he was. I couldn’t help wondering what Hugo was thinking. Did he realise that life outside of his walls wasn’t so great and that he longed to be back in the safety of his home? Or was he regretting not making more of his opportunity to get away from the walls which hold him in? Funnily enough, it’s not just Hugo’s walls that I can’t make my mind up about, but it is also my own. Sometimes I struggle to tell if the boundaries that surround my life are holding me back or keeping me safe; whether or not God wants me to break them down or stay inside them. I guess instead of sneaking out the window I should just ask the Builder and if He wants me to leave them then he can just open the door.